For some reason the power has been down all afternoon throughout the east coast. Rumor has it there was some terrorist attack or something. Who knows? With the world we live in now, it wouldn’t be a big surprise.
I never realized how much we rely on electricity. It practically runs everything I use. It’s actually sad. I think it is a good thing that we’ve had no power for awhile. It will show people how lucky we are. I guess what I am trying to say is that when you have something for such a long time, you begin to forget its importance. We begin to take things for granted. Kind of like “the bitch”. She never really understood how much I loved her till now. I’m guessing not having me around to pamper her and show her my affection has helped her to see just how much I loved her.
I decided to call her yesterday late at night. After making the list it got me thinking. Is this the person I see myself with in the future? The answer is no. I love Lisa. With all my heart. But I know that love isn’t enough. My love for her won’t make the relationship work. I know she loves me too, but it is apparent that no matter what we do, fighting will always arrive. Fighting isn’t even the big problem. I know that in all relationships, arguments happen every now and then. But when a person begins to feel worse about himself time and time again, there is nothing to be done but move on. Still, I know in my heart that I tried my hardest. I did everything I could to try and please her, but nothing was ever good enough for her. And a relationship can’t be healthy if only one person is trying to make it work. I guess she came back because she finally realized that. She probably feels that things could have been different if she had tried a little harder. After going out with those other guys, she probably saw how much I held her in my heart. How I always put her first over everything and everyone. Now that is something she will have to live with.
I called her and told her exactly how I felt about the situation. I told her that it was only hurting us to keep going this way. I also let her know how much she hurt me. At the same time I told her that I forgave her, but we could not be together. She gave me the “lets be friends” thing, but I know that it is impossible to take a step back. I can’t just degrade the relationship from dating to friendship. It doesn’t work that way.
I love you Lisa, with all my heart darling. Goodbye.
In that situation the goodbye was a good thing. Love is sometimes not enough and most people dont realize that. He has a kind heart…..